Taipei
As ‘The Leopard’ blinked, light was reflected from the small metallic disks that covered his eyes. Mirroring his movements, tiny ‘chink, chink, chink’ sound effects came from the percussion section of the orchestra. A few more blinks, a studied pose, then a swift whirl around to begin a highly elaborate fight sequence with a pack of monkeys. Such were the scenes at the Taipei Eye theatre where the eponymous anti-hero battles with the characters from Wu Chengen’s novel ‘Journey to the West’, a wise monk and his disciples travelling from China to India to retrieve some sacred scrolls and thereby save the world. The fight arises from a local nobleman’s request for help, as his daughter is being threatened with forced marriage by the licentious Leopard. After several bouts of wild and acrobatic clashes with staffs and sticks, the travellers emerge triumphant and evil is vanquished again, for now. Some of you might remember the totally bonkers 1970s Chinese television series ‘Monkey’. The characters on stage were the same – the irrepressible simian himself, the ever cheeky Pigsy and woe-is-me Sandy. Monkey magic indeed….
The Leopard and his entourage
The Leopard in his finery
Brother Monkey
What do you mean I look like Mickey Mouse?
But father, what’s wrong with marrying a large angry cat?
Brother Sand
Brother Pig
Peking theatre (and its Taiwanese offshoot) is big business here and it’s taken very seriously, despite the performances being largely comic. Audience members get to watch cast members apply incredibly detailed face-paint, have their own elaborate make-up done too, if they want, and have their picture taken with the characters before the performance starts. We were serenaded into the auditorium by the warbling twangs of a traditional Chinese pipa, mucked about with puppets in the auditorium and took photos of Taiwanese dressing up in theatre costumes. A marevllously entertaining evening that could only be topped off by a visit to a loud & lively craft beer bar. So that’s what we did. There’s a surprise…
First, and lasting, impressions of Taipei contradicted our expectations. For no particular reason we thought it would be like Singapore – bright, glitzy and overly pristine. It wasn’t at all. Parts of the city are so ugly they’re fascinating, beautiful even, at least to my eyes. It was refreshing to see and raised my interest in a city that I expected to be pretty bland. It was however, mega-busy, no doubt the busiest place we’ve encountered on this trip, possibly excepting Shanghai, and nowhere seemed to offer anything other than a mass communal experience – just us and our thousand Taiwanese companions.
Taipei from Yangminshan National Park
Our trekking trip out to the nearby Yangmingshan National Park was a good case in point. Fair enough, it was a Sunday and we were warned that weekends were always busiest, but we were not prepared for what we encountered. We caught the metro to a recommended bus stand where the queues were said to be short. It was massive. We inadvertently incurred the wrath of some other hikers who’d been queuing longer than us as we hopped on the bus before them. Such was the confusion over who was in what queue, it was always likely to happen. We stood in the crowd on the bus for around two hours. If this was on a Mumbai train it would be described as ‘super-dense crush’. No-one seemed bothered.
We started the trek with many others, having to queue to even get on the initial stairway and the trend continued. The hike itself, up the Qixingshan mountain, is relatively easy and short, but with the hoards of trekkers, the sweltering heat and humidity and endless stone steps it seemed more of a trial than a trail. At the top, a typical Taiwanese scene played out. Around the base of a wooden post marking the top of the hill was a large queue, and all the newly arrived locals joined it. Patiently and politely, people waited in line for their turn to have their photo taken standing next to the post. We stopped for a half-hour to have our lunch here and saw hikers still in the queue that were there when we arrived. It’s very noticeable here how the act of having your photograph taken with the thing you’ve come to see is apparently more important than actually seeing the thing you’ve come to see.
Yangminshan National Park
Queuing for the peak-post shot, Qixingshan main peak
Lunch at Qixingshan main peak
After a tiring hike, Helen lets off steam
Fumeroles on the hillside
The rest of the hike and journey back played out along the same lines. We queued to get a bus back to the trailhead, having to miss the first two as there were too many people. At the trailhead we joined another massive queue to get back to Taipei, though again confusion reigned over what everyone was actually queuing for. A bus turned up and we were inexplicably called out of the line to get it. Another two hours back, in the same crush conditions we’d come in, though this experience was slightly more pungent from the sweat of everyone’s hiking exertions…
With that, we lost the essence of the hike – we wanted to breathe the mountain air, stand and admire the views across the lovely wooded hills and take in the wonders of the many smoking, volcanic fumaroles that dot this part of the island. Whilst in effect we did all that, it was always with the ever present and unavoidable distraction of many other people. What we got, no doubt, was a very typical Taiwanese hiking experience, but not one we were overly enamoured with.
The dilapidated ‘House of Alcohol’, Taipei
Dadaocheng, Taipei
Dadaocheng, Taipei
Ximen station area, Taipei
Dadaocheng, Taipei
Dadaocheng, Taipei
Dadaocheng, Taipei
Other aspects of our time here were more agreeable. We spent a relatively relaxed few hours roaming the touristy streets of the Dadaocheng district, popping into little cafes and temples and boutique shops. We caught a ceremony at the superb Longshan temple and here were not too bothered by the masses – everyone was either silently milling about or praying using moon-blocks (Jiaobei). This was particularly fascinating – people ask the gods to verify a question by throwing 2 red, crescent-shaped wooden blocks on the floor and their position indicates the answer. If the blocks land with one flat-side down and the other rounded-side down it’s a ‘yes’, but both landing on flat or rounded sides is either a ‘no’ or ‘you’re having a laugh, aren’t you?’… It was remarkable how many people carried on lengthy, in-depth conversations with their deity as part of this ritual, sometimes on hands and knees, sometimes with elaborate gesticulations. Hopefully some got the answers they were seeking. Some deserved it for effort alone.
Longshan Temple
Longshan Temple Lanterns
Pleading with the gods (seriously)
Equally, a walk up to Elephant Mountain, yet again with several thousand others, afforded a wonderful view of the city skyline on a gorgeous day and in particularly the marvellously shaped Taipei 101 tower, at 508m once the tallest building in the world until it was surpassed by the Burj Khalifa in 2010. A trip up the tower itself was less fulfilling. I find when travelling that I’m compelled to ‘get to the top’ of things like this, yet invariably I’m slightly disappointed. Yes, the views were wide and long, but for most there it was about taking their picture with the cute little plastic animals that were placed in the viewing platform or getting a shot with a Taipei 101 neon sign to prove you’ve been there – a distraction too far in my increasingly cynical view of other people’s priorities…..
Taipei 101 from Elephant Mountain
The Maokong cable car offered the chance to get away from it all and visit some local tea plantations up in the hills above the city, and was purportedly a great ride to boot. The latter was very true and the 4 kilometer ride was wonderful as we glided over trees and the odd bit of tea, with some wonderful views of the city glimmering in the late afternoon sunshine. The destination itself though has become a massive tourist trap, heaving and with hardly any tea plantations in sight. Another expectation dampened by reality and the rigours of dealing with the general public. That said, we queued up to buy a tea-flavoured ice cream with a cat-shaped biscuit stuck in it. Clearly our minds are being warped here…
Taipei in the dusky gloom
One of the better sights in the wider Taipei area is the Yehliu Geopark, a small coastal area where ancient volcanic activity and weathering have conspired to create strange and wonderful rock shapes. Unfortunately Helen contracted a beast of a cold and decided to skip this one, so I was left to my own devices for a day. As with everywhere else, the place was heaving and threatened to overwhelm what should have been an experience I would otherwise have loved. I must be getting used to dealing with the masses though – once I’d shaken off my distaste at the inane and gormless antics of the many tour parties, I began to appreciate the beauty of this remarkable place.
Yehliu Geopark
Mushrooms at Yehliu Geopark
Yehliu Geopark
The Fairy Shoe
If only I had a spoon….
This being Taiwan, some of the formations have been given little nicknames. The most famous is the ‘Queen’s Head’, a rock that appears to have a slender neck and the face of royalty when viewed at a certain angle, apparently. It’s very famous here, so guess what, there was a massive queue of folk lining up to have a picture taken with it. 40 minutes wait or so. There are more impressive features though – an area called ‘The Candles’ where small round balls appear on concave protrusions, like massive creme caramels topped with cherries (should have called it that). There’s also a perfectly round ball of stone in a raised well just off the shore, a group of mushrooms and a formation that looks like a slipper (‘The Fairy Shoe’). The area is littered with the fossils of sea urchins too, making for beautiful floral-like patterns embedded in the rockface.
Saturday Night Fever at Yehliu Geopark
Yehliu Geopark
The Winston Churchill lookalike club visit Yehliu
When you read up on Taiwan, it seems like it’s become a rather trendy place to come, with countless articles extolling its virtues. But nowhere does it say those virtues have to be shared with the rest of humanity put together. We were glad at least that Taipei has character. There is beauty to be found and fun to be had here, in many guises, and it’s that that’s saved it in our eyes. Let’s hope our time in the towns of Tainan and Jiufen convinces us we made the right choice to come here……
Foodnote: A rather unusual experience in the city. On our wanderings through the Ximenling area of Taipei we came across a place called the Modern Toilet, with an enormous plastic lavatory precariously suspended above us on the outside of the building. We took a look – it was a restaurant with a menu that advertised delightfully sounding delectables such as ‘Bleeding Hemorrhoid Strawberry Snow Shaving’ and ‘Dark Piss Americano Coffee’. We gave it a try. Helen went for the ‘Constipation Black Stool Chocolate Poop Pancake’. I went for a curry that came in a small toilet bowl. The lavatorial theme was everywhere. Comedy poo mosaics, poo shaped light fittings, tea that came in toilet mugs and ice-cream in urinals. Unfortunately though, the food was expensive and of really poor quality, and if there’s one thing I hate it’s not getting value for money. Alas, what could have been a fun and amusing lunch out turned into something, if you’ll pardon the pun, a wee bit shit……
Helen tucks into pooding
Fancy a curry? Lavely…
Foodnote: Whilst in Taiwan it would have been totally remiss not to try ‘bubble tea’ in the place where it originated. We expected it to be everywhere, but there are surprisingly few places to buy it, it seemed. However, we found a suitable street-side seller and took his advice about how it should be taken – hot or cold, ice or no ice, amount of milk, level of sweetness etc (nothing’s ever simple is it?). He filled a large cup, put it in a machine to stick a plastic film over the top and handed us a wide straw. For those that don’t know, the ‘bubbles’ in the tea are tapioca pearls or ‘boba’ – large, clear and chewy blobs with no real taste of their own. Our tea advisor had prepared a brew with lots of milk, a slight sweet touch, loads of ice and not much tea. We popped the large straw through the film and took a drink. Helen spat it out immediately and described her opinions in a manner unbefitting of a lady. I managed to drink half of it (mainly as I’d paid for it), but chewing on gelatinous globules with a back-drop of icy-cold, weak & milky tea was not my idea of fun either. We tried at least…….
Foodnote: You can buy Pokemon pot-noodles at a place called ‘Don Don Donki’ in Taipei. For those with more refined tastes, you can also get Snoopy noodles too. Taipei’s most famous food souvenir, though, is the chocolate penis….
Simon (2nd December 2025)
Taipei definitely sounds too busy for my liking and agree with your point re too many tourists more interested in photos of themselves than seeing and soaking up the experience. The geo park looks lovely though and i am wondering if you treated yourselves to a chocolate penis souvenir 🤔
Thought about it, then thought do I really want to take a bite out of this? It seemed just so wrong….
Well you obviously were in the wrong places if they were full of tourists. Go to Blackpool for a chocolate willy. Or not. Get out of the toilet while you can, before the toilet seat traps you. X